Why I wrote this book
I wrote Healing Your Lost Inner Child for personal and professional reasons.
As a young adult when I was about twenty-five years-old I wanted to understand myself better and heal those parts I knew were stuck. Quite simply, I just wanted to feel better about myself and stop making bad choices in my friendships and relationships. I didn't understand why I would sometimes over or under react to situations and then make impulsive emotional choices that I later regretted. Parts of me felt like an adult and other parts felt as if I were a little kid who was hurt and confused.
I found a therapist whom I felt I could trust and relate to and he took me through a process of understanding those younger parts of me that never matured emotionally. He introduced me to the concept of my wounded inner child and at this moment a lightbulb went on inside of me helping me understand why I was reacting to situations in a certain way.
Feeling inspired, I began to do more work on myself through reading, attending workshops and weekend retreats, and continuing individual therapy. I began to heal those parts of myself that were trapped in time (my age of wounding was ten-years-old). All along the way I was helping the once lost inner child part of me to mature emotionally and integrate with my adult self.
It's hard to describe what it feels like when you start to feel like yourself again, when you let go of the wounded responses and take charge, setting boundaries and start making choices with your authentically aligned self. I was beginning to feel authentic, whole and free.
Professionally in my over twenty years as a Psychotherapist I have helped many people discover their wounded inner child that keeps showing up wanting acknowledgment. I saw in my patients what I saw in myself; the wounded part that did not mature emotionally, trapped in a snow globe not even realizing life was moving on.
One of the biggest privileges of being a Psychotherapist is witnessing someone else's work. I have the honor of watching an AHA moment unfold when I am taking someone through the HEAL process and asking "How old does that part of you feel when you do that?" The response is often automatic as the person recognizes a younger age, their age of wounding that comes forward, making impulsive choices and acting out.
It is from this moment of recognition the healing process begins. Once the age of wounding is defined the many confused puzzle pieces fall into place as to why a person makes one choice over another. The wounded defenses start to heal and there is a conscious acknowledgement of the best choice to make in a given situation.
Because I know this process works and have gone through it myself and helped others, I wanted to create a book for people that I would not be able to see in person to help heal their inner child wounding. All of the HEAL exercises in the book I have done myself. I have walked the walk that I am teaching you.
Know that you are reading this book for a reason and you are ready to explore these parts of yourself. Know that the answers are within you. Know all you have to do is find the courage to be vulnerable to and for yourself and begin the process of exploring with your lost inner child.
All my best.
Robert Jackman